Dear Dieter,

You told me that you were thinking about going on another diet, and my heart broke for you. You didn’t ask for my professional opinion and so instead of giving you all the reasons that you shouldn’t do it, I listened and let you tell me all the reasons why this one would be different. I hope you know that:

I see you.
I hear you.
I understand you.
I deeply care for you.
I see the hope in your eyes when you talk about this new diet.
I understand why you HAVE to believe that this diet will make the difference.
I see how uncomfortable you are in your body.
I see the pain in your eyes when body size is brought up in conversation.
I see that it’s sometimes physically painful for you to walk and do other activities of daily living.
I see how triggering our diet culture is for you.
I understand the feelings of failure and shame that you have.
I see that this is something that is really difficult for you, and I understand why that is.
I see that it’s difficult to talk about for you.
I understand why you think this will help solve your problems.

I see it all. I really do understand how you feel. I keep telling myself that maybe, just maybe, this will be the last diet that you go on in your journey to food peace. Maybe it will just take this one more to convince you that it is actually the diets that are failing you, and not you who is failing them. The diet industry is so seductive with it’s lies that I can’t blame you for believing them. It’s not your fault. With the media, internet, and friends/family/associates all around, telling you about the diet that “worked” for them, no wonder you feel the pressure to try this diet.

I just have to say though, if this diet is not something that you can do long term, AKA for the rest of your life, it’s not going to work. Think about your dieting history. Did any of the diets work long term for you? No, they didn’t. That’s why you’re thinking about starting a new one. Did you know that dieting is the #1 predictor of future weight gain? Put down all your defensive walls and let yourself think about this for a second. Have you seen this pattern in your own dieting history? Or in your friends/family/associates dieting histories? I’m guessing that you will see a clear pattern between dieting and weight gain.

I get it though. I understand that it may be easier for you to believe that this diet will change your life then to have to do that deep, self-work necessary to break your dieting pattern. It may be easier for you to believe in this diet then to accept that your body may be that weight for a long time whether you like it or not. Maybe it’s easier for you to hate yourself and diet than to start on the journey to body neutrality and even body love and positivity. I get it. You have to go through your own journey.

But I will be there right beside you through it all.

And I promise to support you and love you.

I just hope, with my whole heart, that one day, dieting won’t be your answer.

With all my love,
Kaylee